Proverbs 23:15
“My son, if thine heart be wise, my heart shall rejoice, even mine.”
Every parent’s desire and concern for their child is that they turn out to be a wise person. Parents hope that their children are listening to their instruction and look for signs that they understand what they were taught. Trying to discern if your child has a wise heart is easily perceived if you know what you are looking for.
Even Solomon was concerned with his son having a wise heart. He reminds his son that if his heart was wise that it would make his parents rejoice. The verses that follow show four evidences that will help a parent discern if their child is wise hearted.
First, the wise-hearted child will have proper conversations. Verse 16 says, “Yea, my reins shall rejoice, when thy lips speak right things.” Every parent needs to listen to their children talk. How they talk will help you in discerning what is in their heart. You can always tell when a child has been trained right because of the way they talk. They can carry on conversations with adults. Their language is not course, rude or improper. They don't fill their time talking about foolish living. They try to use their words to be an encouragement to others instead of berating and making fun of them. You will know when your child’s heart is wise because their conversations will reveal their maturity.
Second, the wise-hearted child will have right desires. Verse 17 says, “Let not thine heart envy sinners…” Let me encourage you to consider the desires of your children. All you have to do is ask your child what they want to do with their life. The wise-hearted child wants nothing to do with how the world lives. You will know if your child has a wise heart by how they discuss the way of sinners. If they tend to defend those ways, you still have some work to do in that area.
Third, the wise-hearted child will choose the right associations. It says in verse 20, “Be not among…” Solomon then goes on and describes a group of people with whom he did not want his son to associate. You will be able to discern whether you have a wise-hearted child by the friends they choose. I encourage you to look at your children’s friends and honestly see if they have chosen the right type of friends. A wise-hearted child will gravitate towards the right people.
Fourth, the wise-hearted child will avoid the wrong atmosphere. Verse 20 wasn't just about choosing the right associations, but it was also showing that the wise-hearted child will avoid the atmospheres that the wrong people frequent. How comfortable your child is when they see the wrong things on television or when you are in an atmosphere that isn't right will reveal what is in their heart. A wise-hearted child will feel uncomfortable in the wrong atmosphere and will do what they can to avoid it.
These four areas will help the parent in discerning if they have a wise-hearted child. If your child lacks in some of these areas, earnestly pray for God to help you guide them to becoming wise hearted. The only way a child will become wise hearted is if their parent teaches them these things. The parent who takes the time to teach and train their children in these areas will be greatly rewarded with a wise-hearted child.