Harboring Ill Feelings
Leviticus 19:17-18
"Thou shalt not hate thy brother in thine heart: thou shalt in any wise rebuke thy neighbour, and not suffer sin upon him. Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself: I am the LORD."
One of my chores when I was a boy pulling the weeds in the flower bed. The easiest time for me to take care of the weeds was when they were in their infancy stage of growth and the roots were not deep in the soil. Every once in awhile I would get behind on pulling weeds, and trying to pull the weeds once their roots had grown deep into the soil was no easy task. The best time to take care of the weeds was when they first started growing.
One of the common principles of the Scriptures is caring for the root of the problem before it is fully grown. In the verse above, God dealt with harboring ill feelings towards people. You will notice that God said that we are not to hate our brother in our heart. In other words, that hatred is not visible to the outside, but it is in our heart. God knew that if someone did not deal with their hatred in their heart that it would eventually grow into bitter feelings and actions. God went further by saying, "Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people,..." You will notice again that God commands us not to hold grudges against people. A grudge is carrying resentment towards someone in our heart for something that happened in the past. God understood that harboring a grudge will eventually destroy a good relationship.
Every married person must be careful about harboring ill feelings towards their spouse. Carrying a grudge against your spouse will not help your marriage. In fact, it will only cause problems that can become irreparable if you let them go too long. The best time for married couples to deal with problems that they have with each other is in the infancy stage. When your spouse has done something to hurt you, be honest with them and deal with it so that it doesn't go any further.
Children must be careful about harboring a grudge against their parents. There are many children who hold grudges against their parents only to see the grudge turn into bitter feelings that are carried into their adult years. If you have problems with your parents, then sit down and talk to them in a reasonable matter. Don't become accusatory, but in a humble spirit talk to them.
Christians must also be careful about harboring ill feelings towards their pastor or other Christian brethren. There are many Christians who quit serving God because they never dealt with ill feelings in their infancy stage. Instead, they let those feelings fester to the point where they become bitter at God and anything that has to do with Him. If they had dealt with the problem in the infancy stage, bitterness and anger would not have set in.
God says in Ephesians 4:26, "Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath:" Christian, be careful about allowing hatred in your heart. The only feeling that we should have towards others is love. If someone does something that hurts you, then be Christian enough to deal with it immediately and in a proper attitude so that hatred will have no place in your heart.