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The Friendship Test
2 Samuel 9:1
"And David said, Is there yet any that is left of the house of Saul, that I may shew him kindness for Jonathan's sake?"
One of the greatest assets in life is friendship. No doubt everyone wants to have friends. Even God desires friends, that is why He called Abraham, "the Friend of God." Because we were created in God's image, and because God desires to have friends, then that means God created you with the desire to have friends. No doubt, one of the greatest influences on a person's life is their friends.
According to the Scriptures, Saul's son, Jonathan, was David's dearest friend. When you read the story of their friendship, their friendship almost made them as close as brothers. Jonathan proved his friendship by risking his life to save David. These two men were the ideal pattern of friendship. In the verse above, you find that even though Jonathan was dead, David still honored his friendship by showing kindness to one of Jonathan's sons. However, in the verse above, I believe you will find the true test of friendship.
First, friendship is for your lifetime. It is interesting that though Jonathan was dead, David still honored his friend. David didn't end his friendship when Jonathan died. David realized that friendship was based on his lifetime and not the lifetime of his friend. When you decide to be a friend to someone, you should understand that true friendship will cover your lifetime. Even if your friend has passed away, you are to continue to honor your friendship with them for the rest of your life. This is important to understand before we go on to the rest of the friendship test.
Second, friendship is about what you can put into it. I fear that too many people choose someone to be their friend for what they can get out of it. That is not true friendship! In fact, in a true friendship you don't look for the other person to do anything for you. This is why many people get angry with someone whom they call their friend. They get upset because their friend never does anything for them. Friendship should never be about what you get out of it, but what you can put into it. True friendship is about what you can do for them and not what they can do for you.
Third, death is the greatest test of friendship. Though Jonathan was dead, David still honored the desires of his friend. Though Jonathan was dead, David still honored the promises he made to his friend. You are not a true friend to someone when you stop honoring their desires and promises once they die. I think of Dr. Jack Hyles, my good friend and pastor who was no doubt one of the greatest preachers of my generation. Many people called Dr. Hyles their friend, and yet now that he has died many have not honored what he preached and that for which he stood. These were not friends at all, they were opportunists. The true friend will continue to honor the desires and promises of their friend even after their death.
Last, don't wait to show your appreciation. If you have a true friend, then don't wait until they die to start honoring them. It would be good for you to periodically do something for your friends. Honoring your friend when they are dead does them no good. You should honor them when they are alive. If you have not done anything to honor your friends, then you are a poor friend.
Do you pass the friendship test? If not, then start working on being a good friend to your friends. If you did pass the test, then continue to work on being a better friend to your friends. One day you will grow old, and when you are old, how you treated your friends will be revealed. Be good to your friends at all times, for they are the ones who stand with you when nobody else does.