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Grieving Properly
Acts 8:2
"And devout men carried Stephen to his burial, and made great lamentation over him."
In the verse above, Stephen was given a proper burial after he was murdered by the angry mob. It is interesting that God mentions that "devout men carried Stephen to his burial." What is interesting to me about this is that God was as concerned about how people dealt with his death as He was about the life of Stephen. In other words, God was showing us that properly dealing with the death of a loved one is part of the process that helps us to move on in life.
Death is one of those unpleasantries of life. I have found that most people don't like to deal with death. Don't get me wrong, I don't enjoy it either, but I know that there is a proper way to deal with the death of a loved one. Christians ought to be as concerned about having a Christian burial as they are concerned with living the Christian life. Let me give you a few thoughts that will help you in dealing with death.
First, get buried properly. What I mean be this is that you should make sure that your body is dealt with in a Christian manner. I believe the examples in the Scriptures show that cremation is not the Christian way to bury a loved one. Remember that Jesus is our example, and we should follow how He dealt with death. When they buried Jesus, they did not cremate his body, but they gave Him a natural burial. The reason for not cremating a body is to show that you believe one day that body will come out of the grave when Jesus comes again. Though some will disagree with this, I believe you will have a hard time seeing anyone who was cremated in the Scriptures.
Second, give yourself time to mourn. You have just lost a loved one and mourning is natural. There are some who try to avoid mourning only to hurt themselves later. Mourning is part of the release of the grief that you carry for your loved one. When a loved one goes to Heaven, give yourself time to grieve.
Third, plan to end the mourning period. You must eventually move on after a loved one has passed away. Christian, your loved one would want you to move on. They are in Heaven, and they know that you will be better off moving on. I'm not saying you should forget them, but you cannot carry that grief forever. You must have a time when you decide to end your mourning period.
Fourth, immediately after the funeral watch your spirit. Though this may sound strange, I warn people about listening to music on Heaven after they have buried a loved one. My reason for saying this is because it will throw you back into the mourning process and you need time for your spirit to heal from the grief. Yes, we should listen to songs on Heaven, but be careful about listening to them immediately afterwards so that you can avoid going back into the mourning process.
Last, periodically give respect and grieve for your loved one. There should be times when you plan to grieve for the one you loved. Maybe at a certain time every year you remember them for what they did for you in your life. Periodically you should go by the graveside to mourn and remember their influence upon your life. This is natural and should be done.
Christian, these steps will help you to move properly through the grieving process when a loved one passes away. This is how I have dealt with the home going of a loved one in my life, and I believe that you will find it will help you too.