Click here to read the Old Paths Journal.
Parenting as a Parent
Job 39:13-15
"Gavest thou the goodly wings unto the peacocks? or wings and feathers unto the ostrich? Which leaveth her eggs in the earth, and warmeth them in dust, And forgetteth that the foot may crush them, or that the wild beast may break them."
Can you imagine such a thing as a parent leaving their child to make it on their own? These verses say that the ostrich buries her eggs in the earth and then leaves them. As bad as this may sound, many parents make the same mistake as the ostrich by leaving their children for society to rear. This is a tragedy! The greatest responsibility that a parent has is to be a parent to their children. It is highly important that as a parent you don't leave the rearing of your children to society, but that you take responsibility and be a parent who knows at least these five things about your children.
First, know what your children do at church. This may seem strange, but just because they are at church doesn't always mean they are safe. For years I have watched with amazement parents who let their children run the church property without any supervision. Let me warn you that the wrong people can take advantage of trusting parents at a church. You should never let your children run the church property without you knowing where they are. Furthermore, you should always know what your children are doing at church. Many children get themselves into trouble because their parents don't keep a watchful eye on them. Know which children they are playing with and where they are going at all times.
Second, know every friend your child has. Your child is not wise enough to choose their own friends. Just because someone calls themselves a Christian doesn't make their children someone with whom your children should run. Part of parenting is teaching your children how to choose the right friends. You teach them by knowing yourself who they call their friends. If they have someone as a friend who is questionable, then you would be wise to tell your child to be kind to that person, but don't play with them.
Third, know where your children are at all times. Before your child leaves your house to go play, you need to ask them where they will be. Then, every once in a while you need to show up unannounced to be sure they are at the right place. You may think this is going too far, but you won't think that when you find out that your child has deceived you and has gone to a place of which you disapprove. Calling them on a cell phone is not the same as knowing where they are. You need to physically see where they are with your own eyes.
Fourth, know what your children are into. You need to know the music that your children listen to by listening to their music playing device yourself. Just because it says its Christian music doesn't make it Christian. Many a young person has fooled their parents by having rock music titled as Christian music. A parent should never let their child on the internet without their supervision. Likewise, a parent should know what is in their child's bedroom. You should periodically search your child's bedroom without them knowing it. You are a parent, and it is your responsibility to know everything about your child.
Last, know what is influencing your children. You need to know what they are being taught at school. Never trust the public or Christian school to teach the right things. You need to know EVERYTHING that they are being taught. If a school ever tells your child not to tell you what they are being taught, get them out of that school immediately! Also, know what they are being taught in the church programs. These influences should agree with the Scriptures, and anything that influences them for wrong should be dealt with in a proper manner.
You only have one chance to help your children turn out right. Your goal is not to be your child's friend, but to be the parent they need. You will eventually become their friend if you will properly parent them.