Baptist City Blog

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Five Things Every Child Should Learn

Proverbs 22:6

"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."

Have you ever noticed that your children didn't come with an instruction manual? It would be nice when a child is born if the instruction manual on how to train them was attached. Many parents would love for that to be the case. However, God did give us an instruction manual for every child, and that is the Word of God. The verse above commands us to train our children in the right way, but what is the right way? When you read the preceding verses, God gives us instructions on what we should train our children to do.

First, train your children in the importance of protecting their name. Verse 1 says, "A good name is rather to be chosen than great riches,..." Your child needs to learn that once they lose their good name it will be hard to recover it. One of the most valuable commodities we are given is a good name. Therefore, we should be sure to train our children to keep it good. Train them in the importance of keeping a good name in their finances and in society. Both of these areas are important in the keeping of a good name.

Second, train your children the importance of looking ahead. Verse 3 says, "A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself:..." One of the greatest things you can teach your children is how to determine how something will most likely turn out. Literally, this is teaching your children how to make decisions. Most children are never taught this, and because they are never taught this they end up making tragic decisions as adults. Teach your children how to make decisions by principle. Teach them the importance of every decision and that they should not be based upon immediate results or satisfaction, but they should be based upon future implications.

Third, train your children in the importance of keeping a proper perspective of themselves. Verse 4 says, "By humility and the fear of the LORD are riches, and honour, and life." You will notice that being humble will help your child to succeed in life. Never allow your children to think highly of themselves. One way to do this is when you compliment them on their physical features, only do so by reminding them that God made them that way. Furthermore, compliment them when they do right, but discipline them when they do wrong. This will help them to realize they are still human.

Fourth, train your children in the importance of keeping God in proper perspective. Verse 4 talks about having the fear of God. Your children need to have a healthy fear of God. They need to learn that God's power can punish them if they do wrong, but also that His power can help them in every area of life. If your children will have a proper fear of God, then they will certainly serve Him.

Last, train your children that an uncontrolled life leads to heartache. Verse 5 says, "Thorns and snares are in the way of the froward:..." Too many children see the fun side of sin, but they never see the heartache that sin causes. The best way to teach your children the heartache of sin is to bring them with you as you serve God. When they see the lives that are broken because of sin, then they learn first hand that an uncontrolled life leads to heartache.

Training children will never be an easy task. Certainly each child will need training that is unique to them. However, every child needs to learn these five things. If they will learn these five principles, then all other areas of training will be easier.

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Two Things You Must Teach Your Children

Isaiah 7:16

"For before the child shall know to refuse the evil, and choose the good, the land that thou abhorrest shall be forsaken of both her kings."

Parents are constantly looking for child-rearing tips that will help their children to turn out right. Often parents go to Christian authors and read their books on rearing children. I must say that this is not a bad thing to do. However, if I were to tell you that I have a tip from Someone Who has a perfect child, then you would certainly be interested in knowing His tips. Well, I do have a tip from Someone Who has a perfect child, and that is God. We often forget that God the Father gave us tips by showing how His Son, Jesus Christ was reared. Though Jesus was the Son of God, we must realize that He took on the robe of flesh and had to overcome everything that you and I have to overcome. These two tips that God gave us are a must for every child to learn.

The first thing you must teach your child is how to refuse evil. The verse above says, "For before the child shall know to refuse the evil,..." Notice that Jesus was taught to refuse evil. When teaching children to refuse evil, they will have to learn how to stand. To refuse something means they were offered something. That means a child is going to have to learn to say, "No" when they are offered something wrong. This means that they will have to learn to stand on their own and not run with the crowd. Until your child learns to stand on their own, they will never learn to refuse evil.

Moreover, your child will have to learn how to separate. One of the reasons it is important for parents to live a separated life is so that they can teach their children how to separate from the wrong crowd. If parents won't live a separated life, then the children certainly are not going to separate from evil when it is offered.

Furthermore, your child will have to learn to take ridicule. When someone is offered evil, and when they refuse that evil, you can rest assured that they will be ridiculed. Part of parenting is building the self-confidence of your child enough so that when ridicule comes they are not intimidated. Only those who lack self-confidence will be affected by ridicule. You must be sure to build your child's self-confidence if you want them to refuse evil in the midst of ridicule.

However, the second thing that your child must learn is how to choose the good. Not only did Jesus know how to refuse evil, but He also knew how to choose good. This means that parents will have to teach their children what is good. The best way to teach your child not to do bad is to teach them good and allow them to experience the good.

Moreover, you will have to teach your children decision-making principles. Your children need to learn how to choose between two good things. Sometimes children are not faced with making a decision between bad and good, but sometimes they must choose between two good things. You must learn to teach them that the good they must choose is the good that God wants the most. There is always good, better and best in every decision. Teach your child that they must look at the future of each decision to determine what is best and scripturally correct.

When children learn to choose between good and evil, then they will have a better chance of doing right their entire life. Parents must not make every decision for their children, but they must learn to teach their children how to make decisions for themselves. If they are taught to make these decisions under your supervision, then when you are gone you have a better chance that they will continue to make the same decisions.

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A Simple Formula to Enjoy Life

Ecclesiastes 9:8

"Let thy garments be always white; and let thy head lack no ointment."

Everybody wants to enjoy life. One of the pursuits of most people is to find a way to enjoy life. Of course, the world looks for enjoyment in things, yet God shows that enjoyment comes from actions and direction. For instance, the world thinks having money will cause them to enjoy life, but money cannot bring enjoyment. The book of Ecclesiastes is about Solomon looking to find the formula to enjoying life. Finally, at the end of his life, he realized what will cause a person to enjoy life.

First, living right will help you to enjoy life. The verse above says, "Let thy garments be always white:..." Living right will help you to enjoy life because it doesn't leave you with regrets. If you will realize that there is always a tomorrow in which you will have to live with the consequences of today's actions, then you will realize that living right is the best way to live. You will never enjoy life when you carry regrets from yesterday's actions. If you will live right, you will find that tomorrow can be filled with good memories from yesterday. Living right doesn't take from life, but living right gives to your life. If you want to enjoy life, then you must start by living right.

Second, enjoying your marriage will help you to enjoy life. Marriage is a big part of life. When a person gets married they will either endure it or enjoy it. Ecclesiastes 9:9 says, "Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life of thy vanity, which he hath given thee under the sun, all the days of thy vanity: for that is thy portion in this life, and in thy labour which thou takest under the sun." Don't just exist in your marriage, but learn to enjoy your marriage. Make your spouse your best friend. I have learned that if your spouse is your best friend, then you will want to enjoy the pleasures of life together. Too many couples do things apart when they should be doing things together. Too many couples run around with their "buddies" instead of making their spouse the one with whom they do everything. Christian, you will never enjoy life to its fullest until you make your marriage what it should be.

Third, if you want to enjoy life, then give your best effort in all that you do. Verse 10 says, "Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might; for there is no work, nor device, nor knowledge, nor wisdom, in the grave, whither thou goest." Again, this goes back to having regrets when you get older. I have watched many people wish that they would have given a better effort in life. One of the best ways to keep from regrets is to give your best effort within everything you do. When you know you have done your best, then you will never look back with the regrets, or wonder "What if?"

Last, if you want to enjoy life then serve God. Ecclesiastes 12:13 says, "Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man." You will never enjoy life without God being the center of your life. You were made to serve God. Therefore, life will never be enjoyed without you fulfilling what you were made to do which is serve God.

Too many people make life complicated. One of the great things about God is that He makes life uncomplicated. Thus, you have this little formula for enjoying life. Though this formula may seem too simple, you will find that with this formula your life will be enjoyable.

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Parenting as a Parent

Job 39:13-15

"Gavest thou the goodly wings unto the peacocks? or wings and feathers unto the ostrich? Which leaveth her eggs in the earth, and warmeth them in dust, And forgetteth that the foot may crush them, or that the wild beast may break them."

Can you imagine such a thing as a parent leaving their child to make it on their own? These verses say that the ostrich buries her eggs in the earth and then leaves them. As bad as this may sound, many parents make the same mistake as the ostrich by leaving their children for society to rear. This is a tragedy! The greatest responsibility that a parent has is to be a parent to their children. It is highly important that as a parent you don't leave the rearing of your children to society, but that you take responsibility and be a parent who knows at least these five things about your children.

First, know what your children do at church. This may seem strange, but just because they are at church doesn't always mean they are safe. For years I have watched with amazement parents who let their children run the church property without any supervision. Let me warn you that the wrong people can take advantage of trusting parents at a church. You should never let your children run the church property without you knowing where they are. Furthermore, you should always know what your children are doing at church. Many children get themselves into trouble because their parents don't keep a watchful eye on them. Know which children they are playing with and where they are going at all times.

Second, know every friend your child has. Your child is not wise enough to choose their own friends. Just because someone calls themselves a Christian doesn't make their children someone with whom your children should run. Part of parenting is teaching your children how to choose the right friends. You teach them by knowing yourself who they call their friends. If they have someone as a friend who is questionable, then you would be wise to tell your child to be kind to that person, but don't play with them.

Third, know where your children are at all times. Before your child leaves your house to go play, you need to ask them where they will be. Then, every once in a while you need to show up unannounced to be sure they are at the right place. You may think this is going too far, but you won't think that when you find out that your child has deceived you and has gone to a place of which you disapprove. Calling them on a cell phone is not the same as knowing where they are. You need to physically see where they are with your own eyes.

Fourth, know what your children are into. You need to know the music that your children listen to by listening to their music playing device yourself. Just because it says its Christian music doesn't make it Christian. Many a young person has fooled their parents by having rock music titled as Christian music. A parent should never let their child on the internet without their supervision. Likewise, a parent should know what is in their child's bedroom. You should periodically search your child's bedroom without them knowing it. You are a parent, and it is your responsibility to know everything about your child.

Last, know what is influencing your children. You need to know what they are being taught at school. Never trust the public or Christian school to teach the right things. You need to know EVERYTHING that they are being taught. If a school ever tells your child not to tell you what they are being taught, get them out of that school immediately! Also, know what they are being taught in the church programs. These influences should agree with the Scriptures, and anything that influences them for wrong should be dealt with in a proper manner.

You only have one chance to help your children turn out right. Your goal is not to be your child's friend, but to be the parent they need. You will eventually become their friend if you will properly parent them.

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Dealing with Sleepless Nights

Esther 6:1

"On that night could not the king sleep, and he commanded to bring the book of records of the chronicles; and they were read before the king."

There is nothing worse than trying to get a full nights rest and not being able to sleep. If you are like me, when I go to bed I am usually exhausted from a full day's work. Sleep is important because it allows your body to get strength to help you through another day. The lack of sleep can adversely affect your attitude, health, production, mental sharpness, and outlook on your day and life. It is important that you get the sleep that your body needs. However, there are times when your mind is so busy that you will find it hard to sleep. When you find it hard to sleep, then let God's advice help you to get sleep.

First, ask God to give you sleep. Psalm 127:2 says, "It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep." When I am especially tired and know that I don't have as many hours to sleep as usual, I will ask God to help me sleep and to give me the strength of a full nights rest. There is nothing wrong with you asking God to help you sleep because there is nothing sinful about sleeping. If God gives His beloved sleep, then you would be wise to ask Him to help you sleep before you run to the doctor to get a sleeping pill. The best sleeping pill is God.

Second, work hard. Ecclesiastes 5:12 says, "The sleep of a labouring man is sweet, whether he eat little or much: but the abundance of the rich will not suffer him to sleep." The harder you work, the easier it is to sleep. The more you pack into your day, the better chance you will have of sleeping at night. One of the biggest reasons people have problems sleeping is because they have done nothing to get tired during the day. The harder you work the easier you will find it is to sleep.

Third, read books when you can't sleep. In the verse above, when the king couldn't sleep he read books. Instead of turning on the television when you can't sleep, pick up a book and start reading. The reason reading will help you sleep is because reading works the mind and eyes. If you will read for a while, you will find yourself getting sleepy, thus being able to get the sleep you need.

Fourth, keep a calm mind before you go to sleep. Daniel 2:1 says, "And in the second year of the reign of Nebuchadnezzar Nebuchadnezzar dreamed dreams, wherewith his spirit was troubled, and his sleep brake from him." You will notice Nebuchadnezzar could not sleep because his spirit was troubled. In other words, you need your spirit to be calm to sleep well. You will find it hard to have a calm spirit if you do heavy work right before going to bed. Tone down your work a couple of hours before you go to bed to help calm your spirit so you can get some good sleep.

Last, use your sleepless nights to pray. Daniel 6:18 says, "Then the king went to his palace, and passed the night fasting: neither were instruments of musick brought before him: and his sleep went from him." When everything above has failed to put you to sleep, then use that time to pray. Maybe the reason God won't let you sleep is because He wants you to spend some time with Him. I have found that many great prayers have been answered because of sleepless nights. If you can't get to sleep past midnight, then use the remainder of the night to pray.

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A Trowel and a Spear

Nehemiah 4:21

"So we laboured in the work: and half of them held the spears from the rising of the morning till the stars appeared."

Anytime you attempt to do a great work for God, you can rest assured that attacks will come your way. Nehemiah experience this when he tried to build the walls around Jerusalem. The enemies threatened that they would come by force and tear down the wall. Apparently, the attacks became so fierce that Nehemiah felt it was needed for them to keep their weapons by them while they built the wall. Though they had to fight, they never lost their purpose of why they had to fight, and that purpose was so they could build the walls.

Whether you are trying to do God's will for your life, or you are attempting to build lives, you can be assured that opposition will come. If you don't have any opposition with what you are doing for the LORD, then I would advise you to be sure that what you are doing is actually what the LORD wants you to do. Throughout the Scriptures we read that those who set out to do the LORD's work faced opposition. Even Jesus Himself faced opposition in His ministry.

The reason you need both trowel and spear in the LORD's work is because you must fight and build at the same time. You will never be successful in the LORD's work without building. You must always remember that the LORD's work is mainly about building lives. When you attempt to build lives, the Devil will fight against you. If you are building lives through teaching a Sunday school class, then you will face opposition. When you try to build lives through a bus route, then you will face opposition. When a pastor tries to build lives through the church he pastors, he can be assured that he will face opposition. You must build, but you will have to fight against those things that try to keep you from building lives.

Let me make this clear, the spear is to be used in the ministry. There are many in Christianity today who avoid fighting because they just want to get along with everyone. If you are going to stay right in your stance with truth, then you will have battles that you must fight. You cannot be afraid of fighting if you are going to be successful in building lives.

Furthermore, the purpose of the spear is to keep the trowel moving. You must always stay focused on the purpose of why you must fight battles, that purpose is to build lives. You should not fight because of personality conflicts, but you should only fight to keep the faith that builds pure lives. If something doesn't affect the faith, then I should not get involved in that battle.

Let me make this clear, if the spear is not used, then you will lose the use of the trowel. Both spear and trowel are necessary to build lives. Likewise, if the trowel is not used, then the spear will destroy lives. The spear and the trowel balance each other. The spear used alone hurts and destroys. Likewise, the trowel used alone will lead to compromise. They both must be used together.

When both trowel and spear are used, then lives will be built to their greatest potential. Always remember that using the spear to fight battles is for the sole purpose of building lives. Whatever would hinder you from building lives must be fought against. Be sure that your Christian life is equipped with trowel and spear so that you can build the lives that God intends for you to build.

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Avoiding Potential Temptations

1 Chronicles 14:12

"And when they had left their gods there, David gave a commandment, and they were burned with fire."

Avoiding potential temptations is important to the success of your Christian life. David understood this importance, and he took some great steps to avoid these potential downfalls. It was a common occurrence for the heathen to take their gods to war as a belief that their presence would cause military success. God knew that this was the heathen's practice, so He commanded in Deuteronomy 7:25, "The graven images of their gods shall ye burn with fire: thou shalt not desire the silver or gold that is on them, nor take it unto thee, lest thou be snared therein: for it is an abomination to the LORD thy God." David obeyed this command and burnt the heathen gods so that they would not become a lure to the children of Israel.

It is important that every Christian learns to destroy potential temptations that could destroy them. One of the reasons many Christians fall into sin is because they allow potential temptations to stay in their presence. This is foolish because nobody is able to consistently be in the presence of temptation without it eventually overtaking them. If you don't want to yield to temptation, then you should destroy those things that could be potential temptations.

First, you ought to destroy those things that are potential temptations for everyone. There are some things that can tempt you because you are involved with their activities. For instance, when you are involved in sports leagues you could be tempted to miss church for a championship game. Being involved in a sports league is not sinful, but when they have games that would cause you to miss church, then they become sinful. You would be better off not joining the league so that you won't be tempted to miss church. You may say that you would never miss church when the pressure is not upon you, but when that pressure is applied, you could easily yield to the temptation by justifying one church service as not that big of a deal. This is just one area that I have used to illustrate temptations that everyone could face. Whatever could be a potential temptation in your life should be avoided.

Furthermore, you should destroy those things that are potential temptations unique to yourself. If you used to be involved in some sin, then you have a temptation that is unique to that sin. I recall a story about a young man who used to go to places where women would display themselves in a wicked manner. After this young man got saved, he was riding in the car with his pastor when they were about ready to pass by one of those establishments. This young man bent over and put his face in his lap and asked the pastor to let him know when they were past a certain street. The pastor asked this young man why he buried his face in his lap. The young man responded by telling the pastor that before he got saved he used to frequent a place that they drove by, and he found that the best way to avoid being tempted by this place was to never look at it again. He said when he was driving by himself, he would arrange his driving route so as to avoid driving by that place. You must do the same thing this young man did with any temptation that is unique to yourself. You must destroy any potential temptations that could cause you to go back into sin.

You know what you are tempted by or what could tempt you. If you want to avoid the sin that the temptation tries to lure you into, then destroy that temptation and you will destroy the possibility of committing the sin that that temptation would cause.

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When Leadership Falls

1 Chronicles 10:4

"Then said Saul to his armourbearer, Draw thy sword, and thrust me through therewith; lest these uncircumcised come and abuse me. But his armourbearer would not; for he was sore afraid. So Saul took a sword, and fell upon it."

The responsibility that leadership holds is greater than one would imagine. Most leaders have no idea how many they influence. There are two times when you will find out the influence of a leader: at their death, or if they fall. When Saul fell, it influenced many in an adverse way. I find that the same influence Saul's falling had on others is the same today when a leader falls. Let me show you several unfortunate results that happen when a leader falls.

First, it will cause others to spiritually die. Verse 5 shows us that when Saul killed himself his armourbearer committed suicide as well. Many times when a leader falls you will find people who will no longer serve the LORD. Many become so disenchanted with serving God after a leader's failure that they will never again step foot into a church. This is sad!

Second, when a leader falls it will affect their family. Saul did not die alone, but he had three sons who died with him. Many leaders who fall in sin never take into consideration the affects it will have on their family. If you love your family, you will avoid sin. Those who let sin destroy them may have to face the punishment for their sin, but they will never experience the deep hurt that the family must deal with. They not only have to deal with it personally, but they usually have to face the questions from outside the family as well.

Third, when a leader falls it will leave many brokenhearted. Think of all the people who were brokenhearted when Saul fell. The impact of a leader falling will hurt many. Those who greatly admired the leader will be hurt dearly. Yes, they will continue to go on, but the immediate hurt and questions will be substantial.

Fourth, when a leader falls it will give many an excuse to compromise. Verse 7 shows us that many people left their inheritance after Saul's death. We will never know how many people have compromised because a leader fell into sin. Though one's fall is never an excuse to compromise, that does not mean that it won't happen. You will always find many who will use their leader's failing as an excuse to compromise.

Fifth, when a leader falls it gives the heathen ammunition to back their ways. When Saul fell, the Philistines took his body and hung it up in the temple of their gods. We must understand that sin always brings reproach to God's name. Sin always hurts the cause of Christ.

Every leader needs to consider the ramifications of their actions. If you fall, many will fall with you. Every leader needs to consider their actions as to how it will affect those whom they lead. I believe many leaders would never commit sin if they would consider and understand the affects of their actions.

However, if your leader falls, instead of using it as an excuse to commit sin, use it as motivation to step up and do more for the cause of Christ. Verse 11 shows us that the men of Jabesh-gilead used Saul's failure as motivation to do right. If your leader falls, you are needed more than ever to step up. Unfortunately leaders will fall, but when they do, use it as a challenge to stay away from sin and to help more people for Christ's sake.

A Strange Choice

Psalm 135:4
"For the LORD hath chosen Jacob unto himself, and Israel for his peculiar treasure."

Is it not strange that the LORD chose to use Jacob? When you look at Jacob's life, you would wonder why God would use such a character. Jacob lived a deceitful life. He deceived his brother and stole the birthright. He deceived his father by acting like Esau and getting the family's blessing. He deceived his father-in-law when it came to the cattle that were born. The fact is, Jacob was not someone whom you could trust. He was a man whose whole life was filled with deceit. Yet, the LORD chose "...Jacob unto himself,..."

This should encourage everyone who reads this that God can use you also. You must understand that you don't have to be perfect for God to use you. I know, the Devil whispers in your ear that you could never do anything for God, but you must realize he is doing this to discourage you from surrendering to God. The Devil knows that God will get the glory if He chooses to use you. Face it, most of the people in the Scriptures are of questionable character. David put out a contract to have a man killed. Moses killed someone with his own hands. Paul was a mass murderer before he got saved. Abraham had an affair with a woman that resulted in an illegitimate child being born. Peter had problems with a cursing tongue. Rahab had a very bad background. On and on we could go and see how God chose to use people of ill backgrounds. If God can use people like this, then certainly He could choose to use you if you would let him.

God does not choose to use people because of who they are, but He chooses to use people because of Who He is. You must understand this, God looks at His character and not your character. He knows what He can do with people whose backgrounds are not the greatest. He knows this His character can cover your character. In fact, God is simply trying to change the perception of who you are. You must stop thinking that God cannot use you because of who you are. You must realize that He chooses to use you because of Who He is.

Furthermore, God does not choose to use people because of what they have done, but He chooses to use people because of what He can do. Yes, your past may be filled with many bad things, but God looks at His record of how He has done many things with other people who have a less than desirable background. God knows that He can use you, for He has used far less desirable people than you in the past.

Christian, let me encourage you that God can use you if you will allow Him to do so. Don't let the Devil keep you on the sidelines with his lies that you are too bad for God to use. Remember that there is not a person alive who hasn't done something that they shouldn't have done. God can use you if you will allow Him. Yes, you may be a strange choice in your eyes, but in God's eyes you are the right choice. Trust God's choice, and do your best with what He asks you to do. You will find that God has a great future planned for you if you will surrender your will to His. God can use you in His work if you will get in His work and start trying to help others whom He also could use.